Call me crazy, but don't call me

"We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company." (Lily Tomlin)

I remember when I was much younger, my siblings and I would all run to the phone as soon as it rang. Probably because even with the ringer at its lowest setting, it was still rather intrusive. If it happened during dinner, the phone would still be answered and whoever was calling would be asked to call back. We were nothing if not polite.


These days, in my own home, my husband and I rarely answer the phone. Ever.

We’re not hiding out; it’s just that most of the calls aren’t for or about us. Ever.

“Please stay on the line for an important announcement….” Call me and put me on hold? I don’t think so.

“You have won….” No, probably not.

“I’m calling about the quote you signed up for….” No, you’re not because no, I didn’t.

“Real Americans have to take America back….” Click.

The rule is, if we don’t know the number or the caller, we’re not answering.

Oh yes, we’re on the so-called Do Not Call list, but I’m sure everybody sees how well that works.

In the past week, I’ve realized that when the phone rings, especially during daytime hours, I don’t even look at the display to see who’s calling.

I work at home and meetings are conducted over the computer using our Internet connection to the outside world. One friend and I talk using FaceTime exclusively. Most communication seems to be done using Facebook. And my siblings always call my cell number to chat. Every now and then someone will even email, but that seems to be used less and less. I’m thinking of setting up another email address for people to contact me, then my current email address can be my “spam” collector.

So, why do we have a phone line in the first place? Our Internet connection is DSL, so it already comes with a line. Also, there is convenience. For some reason, there are times when I’ve had to print, sign, and fax back documents for one thing or another. (Why we can’t just scan the documents after they're signed and email them back is a mystery to me.) We live remotely, so going somewhere else to fax is a hardship. Finally, the phone line is connected to our satellite receiver for any upgrades.

Many years ago, before cell phones were so ubiquitous, I was on a business trip in Singapore. As we drove around, I asked my host about all the young people I saw on the streets talking on cell phones. I was told that everybody had them. I replied that at that time in the U.S. when people saw kids with cell phones, they would assume that the kids were selling drugs. My host replied, Yes, but we don’t use answering machines.” The difference in customs made sense.

I nearly avoided the pager entirely; I had to wear one for one day. Finally, we broke down and got cell phones, at which point I stopped wearing a watch. And a few years ago, we made the transition reluctantly (and later gratefully) to smartphones.

I know many have opted to become land-line free and use cell phones exclusively. I’d like to see that in my future, too. If you’ve done that or thought of doing that, tell me about it in the comments below.

Just don’t call me.